The World According to Angela

We like to cruise. Does that mean we’re an “old” 50? Sometimes I think we are.

Regardless, we just booked our annual Carnival cruise. Telling you that it’s a Carnival cruise tells you what kind of cruisers we are.

We cruise during that low season, between the week after Labor Day and the week before Christmas. We have a strict budget. Our limit is $200/day, including tips. So for a 5-day cruise, the most we’re going to pay is $1000 for the two of us. That’s for a stateroom with a balcony and includes $100 ($20/day) for tips.

We usually wait as late as we can to book, looking for a price drop. We learned our lesson last year when the price went up instead of down so we booked early this year. We’re doing an 8-day Southern Caribbean and we’re within our price window, including tips AND cruise terminal parking. Not bad at all.

A colleague of mine regularly does the Tom Joyner cruise. He paid over $4000 for the trip. I’m hoping that’s for him and his wife but I’m thinking that was per person since he said they had either a suite or a balcony. I almost fainted. That’s a lot of money. He reminded me that a portion of the cost was tax-deductible because it goes to the Tom Joyner Foundation to fund college scholarships. He also said he had a great time so the cruise was worth the cost. I just nodded. By the way, Royal Caribbean calls this year’s cruise an 8-day cruise. Carnival would call it a 7-day cruise since you really come back home on the 8th day.

On our last cruise, we met a couple at one of the tourist sites in Mexico. It was supposed to be a Mayan ruin but I think it was a tourist trap. Anyway, back to this couple. We were sitting (of course) at a bench along one of the paths when they joined us. They were on Royal Caribbean. The wife proceeded to tell us how much better Royal Caribbean was than Carnival and encouraged us to cruise Royal next time. They were on a 6-day cruise and we were on a 5-day cruise; we both had a balcony. Guess what? We cruised on Carnival for less than half the price they paid on Royal. Their eyes widened when they learned that and I got the feeling they’d be checking out Carnival next time.

Price aside, cruising works for us because it cuts down on the decision-making. We don’t have to decide which restaurant to go to or which show to see. We just go. And the variety of activities is so great that we each get to do things we want to do. We also like that they make up our beds twice a day. I know this is a small thing but it’s nice have a freshly made bed in the morning and right before bed, especially if you take a nap during the day the way we do. We also don’t have to cook. Food is always available, which is good and bad.

We also like the different cruise destinations. On our last cruise, which was out of New Orleans, we visited Cozumel and Progresso, Mexico. On our upcoming cruise, we’ll be leaving from Ft. Lauderdale and going to St. Maarten, St. Lucia and St. Kitts. We want to do a South American cruise sometime in the future. Those are about 15-days one way so we have to figure out how to do it.

There are some downsides to cruising. People can be rude. Children can be rowdy. And some people drink too much. That said, a cruise is what you make it. We haven’t had much interaction with the rude, the rowdy or the drunk. You can have a good time on a cruise or you can have a bad time. It’s really up to you.

Does anyone else like to cruise?

Before my hubby was my hubby, we had the “money” discussion. It wasn’t a difficult discussion to have, but it was a difficult one to schedule. We both knew we needed to do it, but we kept putting it off.

In preparation for this talk, we agreed that we would each pull our credit report and share it with the other person. Talk about feeling naked! When you start looking at your life in terms of those 20+ pages from Equifax it’s a bit unsettling. Once the credit reports were printed, we had to share them. Then we had to look at them. All that took a couple of months!

Once we finally sat down for the talk, things went smoothly. Given that we are both older, we each had made long-term financial commitments to others in our families. He had obligations to his children and I had obligations to my parents. We discussed those and what they would mean to us and our financial future. It wasn’t a painful discussion at all.

Because of that discussion, we were able to plan our budget and individual contributions before we were married. We share expenses but we both keep our individual financial accounts. This has worked out well.

We don’t have his and her money when we vacation; we have vacation money. That led to an interesting “encounter” (I don’t want to call it an argument) during our last vacation. I’ll have to tell you about that in another post.

So did you have the “money” talk before you married? If so, how did it go? If you didn’t have it, do you wish you had?

It’s been a while since I’ve posted one of my Newlywed at 50 posts. I admit that I haven’t posted because I was a bit embarrassed by the incident that I needed to share. Well, today I take the leap and tell the story.

Confession: I’m a 50-year old married woman but sometimes I act like a high school teenager.

There I’ve said it. Guess what caused this bit of insight?

Recently George went on a 10-day out-of-town trip, our first separation since our marriage. Guess what I learned from that trip? It’s good have mutual expectations for calling. You can see where this is going, right? I told you it was high school.

Anyway, the first day he was away, I would guess he called me about one hundred times. Okay, I’m exaggerating, but he did call a lot. A whole lot. At one point, I might have asked, “Why are you calling?” I didn’t add “so much” but I was thinking it.

Well, the next day he called about 4 or 5 times. Guess what? I started wondering why he wasn’t calling me more often. I told you it was high school. The good news is I didn’t comment on this to him.

The next day I had to call him! Now I’m getting angry. Can’t the man pick up the phone?

The next day he called so early he woke me up. What was my first thought? Why is he calling so early?

Lesson learned: He can’t win when it comes to calling me when he’s away because I can’t be satisfied.

Had anyone told me I’d be this silly at this age, I would not have believed them. Somebody please tell me they’ve been just as silly.

I have done a lot of solo traveling in my time. I’ve also travelled a lot with girlfriends. I have to say that traveling with a husband or a fiance is quite different. Traveling with a husband is also different from traveling with a fiance.

George and I stayed with my mom several times while we were dating and during our engagement. It’s nice that when we stay with her now we get to sleep together in the “big bed” in the “big room.” I get the feeling my mom’s glad we’re married. Now she doesn’t have to give up two of her rooms when we visit. I actually felt like a grown-up the first time we stayed with her after we were married. Strange, huh?

In general, traveling is different with my new hubby. That include driving trips. He’s the driver. I automatically get in on the passenger side every time I get in the car. This is a big one for me, but it’s been an easy adjustment. To let you know how little I drive, I got in the car the other day and I’d forgotten where the emergency blinkers were. I’m only the designated driver at night and that’s because my night vision is better than his.

If we’re doing a road trip, we start early with him at the wheel. When he gets tired, I take over. He usually ends up driving 2/3 of the way to my 1/3. It took me a while to get used to his driving though. During our first road trips, I couldn’t sleep while he drove. We are drastically different drivers. He drives slower than I do. I used to watch the speedometer while we were on the interstate and every time his speed dropped below 70 (it would go as low as 60), I’d get anxious and my head would start hurting. He also made more stops at rest stops than I did. As a single woman on the road, I never stopped at rest stops. Wendy’s was my stop since their bathrooms were always clean. Now I’m a rest stop lover.

I’ve gotten used to his driving now, so I tend to sleep when he’s at the wheel. He sleeps when I drive but not easily. He thinks I drive too fast and follow too closely. He used to put on brakes on his side of the car when I was driving. Talk about irritating! He doesn’t do it anymore. At least, I don’t think he does.

Air travel is a real bonus. He carries the bags, all of them. I have to beg to carry my own bag. I’ve given up. If he wants to do it, I let him do it. As my momma told me, “Let the man be nice to you.” So I do.

We like cruising. The details of why I’ll discuss in another post. Anyway, hubby really takes over when we get off the ship at the shore destinations. He negotiates with the cabbies and tour bus drivers. He negotiates with the vendors. This is important because I don’t negotiate. I ask people what they charge and then I pay it. He doesn’t go for that. So when we’re off the ship, he carries all the cash. Why? Because he’s afraid I’m going to pay way too much for something and/or give it all away. He’s probably right.

The result is that I’ve developed a negotiation strategy. I simply tell the vendor, “He’s not going to let me buy that at that price. How low can you go?” Guess what? It works. Well, it works sometimes. One woman told me that the next time I came to Jamaica I needed to bring my own money. I was insulted but it was sorta funny.

He’s also the trip photographer. Left to me, we’d have no pictures from any trip.

By now, you’re probably wondering what value I bring to the travel. To be honest, I’m wondering that myself. Not really. I keep track of each day’s itinerary. Before the GPS, I was also in charge of directions. I guess my job will be to input the addresses in the GPS. We’ll see.

Okay, who does the driving in your house? What’s it like traveling with your significant other?

I hope you all had a blessed holiday season, enjoying your family and being thankful for what you have.

We spent Christmas with my mother in Atlanta. My cousin and her husband were also there. My mom wanted to prepare everything so nobody brought anything. And she prepared a feast. I would list everything she cooked but it would take the entire post. The preparation was her gift to us, she said, and you could tell how much she enjoyed doing it. My mom’s a young 72 and I thank God everyday for her good health and good spirits.

Given the state of the economy, most of our gifts this year were cash. It was very much appreciated. I just wish we had more to give.

George and I did exchange gifts. We went out on December 23rd and purchased them together. He got a GPS for the car and I got the iPhone (8 GB). He loves the GPS but the iPhone may be going back. The experience is not at all what I expected, though it was nice to return e-mails while sitting for an hour in traffic on Christmas Eve.

About that GPS. I learned early in my relationship with George that the old saying about men and directions was true, but this GPS has brought it home in a brand new way. Guess what? He debates the GPS. I couldn’t believe when he first did it. We decided to use it going out to dinner one night. Well, the GPS said the restaurant was on the right and he said it was on the left. I just looked at him. He was challenging “the lady,” which I how we refer to the GPS.

So now he has a GPS that he has to learn to trust. Men are too funny! My only comment during these GPS debates is “trust the lady” and then I shut up. Hey, if you’re not driving, there’s not too much you can say anyway.

I’d love to hear about your holidays. It’ll be a great way to start the year.