Awakening Mercy was the first book of yours that I read, being an avid Christian fiction reader at the time, but I loved that book and went on to read Abiding Hope and the writing book. It’s great to hear how it all happened.

Take care,

Dera

Sigrun, my heart and prayers are with you and your family. I thank God for you and for the heart that you have for Him and the love that you have for the family in which He has placed you.

I was especially touched by this statement:
“*She* was my Christian model for a long time before I made another realization: Christ himself is our *only* model.”

What a powerful lesson! I remember my roommate in College saying that I was an example to her of what it meant to be a Chrisian, not because I always did everything right but because I didn’t! Now that sorta stung at first, but I do think it helps others to see us acknowledge where we fall short, repent, and move on with life in the Lord. Anyway, thanks for sharing that.

I’ll say a prayer for Jock and Ausma.

Anyway, poor Jock is very down about this latest turn of events. Who can blame him? Please pray that this might lead him back to accepting the Lord. His wife, Ausma, now has completed 3 chemo sessions and is doing fairly well on that front. I told David, who is not a believer either, that I had asked others to pray for them. Maybe he, too, will realize that prayer can change things; that knowing the Lord is of vital importance. We don’t know what the purpose in life’s happenings is. Only God does and all we can do, is be ready when someone asks for the help we can give in leading them to God. Only the Holy Spirit can prepare their hearts for that.

Now thia is off-topic. But anyway, even as a child I learned a lot about the Bible. Somewhere I still have my view of the Christmas story from before my 7th birthday. My mother had written it down. I accepted Jesus as my Savior at a summer Bible camp when I was 9. Soon I became plagued with a lot of guilt which I confessed in my prayers but was afraid to reveal to anyone else. I felt you should not sin anymore, and I knew I did.

Anyway, I eventually learned that we *do* still sin and accepted the fact but the feelings of guilt have never left completely. However, it taught me to be tolerant of the failings of other Christians. We truly are human and God loves us despite that. The person I had the most trouble forgiving that fact was actually my mother because she had told me about her marvelous experiences with God’s guiding hand and she was still doing things which made me angry. *She* was my Christian model for a long time before I made another realization: Christ himself is our *only* model.

There is that ambivalence between people who think that as a Christian you can sin at will because you will be forgiven and those that think you must be perfect to be a Christian.

What we must really accept, despite all our sins and guilt, is that we are God’s works in progress. We will never be perfect in this life. And that is so that no-one can claim perfection except Christ himself. Therefore, forgiving ourselves is a key point that I find harder even than forgiving others for their failings.

Angela, just know and don’t ever forget that none of us follows God’s will for our lives completely and exactly. God, however, will bring us around to doing it whenever we are ready to do so. I’m sure you have discovered that yourself or you wouldn’t be the person you are today.

Big hugs and thanks for sharing your journey with us.